We run our website the way we wished the whole internet worked: we provide high quality original content with no ads. We are funded solely by your direct support. Please consider supporting this project.

Gays and God’s Beebe Bird Massacre
So, what about those thousands of birds that died suddenly in Beebe Arkansas on New Years Eve? Some say it was caused by fireworks. Others say it more likely was due to hail or lightening. And, of course, there will always be those who chalk it up to pesty aliens. (Why don’t they just leave us ALONE?!)
Well another option has recently been put on the table for our careful consideration (surely you knew this was coming!). Cindy Jacobs, widely regarded as a prophetess in charismatic circles, has produced a short video suggesting that this bizarre event was a sign from God expressing his disapproval of the recent repeal of “Don’t Ask Don’t Tell” (a policy that forbid gays from being open about their orientation while serving in the military). As confirming evidence, Cindy points out that this policy was put in place by President Bill Clinton whom, you may recall, came from Arkansas!
There ya go!
Let’s be clear what this revelation means folks. It seems God IS okay with our warfare in general. No birds were supernaturally smitten when the U.S. invaded Iraq, Afghanistan, Grenada, or dropped the bomb on Hiroshima. And, so far as we know, no birds have been smitten over our half trillion dollar military budget while a billion neighbors lack basic food and shelter. The Almighty is okay with this. It’s only after we allowed gay soldiers to stop hiding that he unleashed the Beebe bird massacre.
Basically, all those smitten birds were God’s way of saying, “Soldiers, you can keep killing, but get back in the closet!”
People, how many more poor blackbirds will have to die before we get the point!?!
I don’t know, but if God is going to keep communicating this way, I’m thinking he should consider hiring a new press agent or something. His warnings just don’t seem to be landing lately. Some may recall the famous church steeple warning a few years back. One could argue it also was a bit too subtle.
So you’re probably wondering why I even bother to blog about nonsense like this? Well, I find that if I don’t allow myself to laugh, I easily begin to get angry. Also, if followers of Jesus don’t publicly distance themselves from nonsense-in-Jesus-name, then non-believers naturally assume that buying into this nonsense is simply what Jesus followers do. (Sadly, I first heard this story on Anderson Cooper’s CNN program last night.)
Peace
ps. Don’t forget, NDY party/fundraiser for Providence Ministries at the Dugout in Mahtomedi, MN, THIS FRIDAY (1/14), 8:30 -12:00.
Category: General, Lighten Up
Tags: Current Events, Problem of Evil
Related Reading

Did God Cause the Polar Vortex?
When is this polar vortex thing going to end? It’s March, and even in Minnesota we expect to see temperatures warmer than this. With all of the sleet and cold in the south, it seems like schools are closing more than they are open. While this is not a catastrophic event like a hurricane, tsunami,…

Why Does God’s Activity Seem So Arbitrary?
Why? It’s the question that never goes away. Why is one infant born sickly and deformed when at the same time another is born perfectly healthy? Why does tragedy repeatedly strike one family while another seems to enjoy uninterrupted peace? On and on we could go with examples. It all seems so arbitrary and unfair.…

Why Compatibilistic Freedom Does Not Make Sense
Compatibilism is the view that free will is compatible with determinism. In this view, freedom is defined as the ability to do what you want, though what you want is determined by factors outside of you. Theologians who espouse this perspective, hold that God ultimately determines what individuals want. This is in contrast to “self-determining…

Why did God create me with an uncontrollable sex drive?
Question: Why did God create us with far more of a sex drive than we need for reproduction and far more than we can handle to refrain from sex before and outside of marriage? It seems like a cruel joke! Answer: Sex is a wonderful, beautiful, God-glorifying gift. It’s not just for reproduction–it’s also for…

If God Can’t Control, How Can I Trust Him?
Question: If God can’t always answer our prayers for healing, for example (and I completely understand why—free will etc), then HOW can he promise to bring good out of the bad things that happen? Surely he is powerless to do that too? And if he can bring good why can’t he therefore heal in the…

The Magi and an Arbitrary Massacre
On a cool fall night in Bethlehem, late in the 34th year of the reign of king Herod, a peasant family of five sleeps quietly in a one room shanty at the edge of town. They are startled awake as two Roman guards burst through their door shouting something about an edict from a king.…